Fairy and the limits of her optimism

Fairy, "So, if he hooks up with some other girl, will you feel bad?"

Me, "I might be sad but I will not feel bad or angry about it."

Fairy, "Why not?"

Me, "Why should I? Why should he wait for me?"

Fairy, "Why not?"

Me, "Because every time we talk it is like friends. Neither he has said anything nor have I. He has no reason to wait for me and I have no reason to expect that. And the kind of person I am, I will not take a step unless he does."

Fairy, "I always thought there is a silent commitment between you guys."

Me, "Not really. I mean, we just started talking RECENTLY. Before that we were in our own worlds wooing and being wooed by different people. And every time we have talked it is just like friends. Although he is always concerned about what is happening with me and everything but I guess any friend of mine would do that. Yea, he might be the only guy who does that. Anyway, from my past experience I should not really rely on my intuitions because no matter how right I am, guys can always end up being a jerk.  So I do not expect him to wait for me. I will be sad, maybe but I will not feel betrayed or anything."

After some more conversation
Me, "Yes. If he hooks up with a friend of mine or a girl who is very similar to me, that is when I will feel betrayed."

P.S. Silent Commitment? Happens only in movies.

News Today

I wake up to a wonderful morning and was startled by the following posts.

A man dies on the hospital doorstep while health care professionals ignored him. The passers-by were busy filming him. 11 medics suspended -The Telegraph

According to BBC, loneliness is a "major health issue." Loneliness has always been associated with early mortality, mental and other health conditions. I think people should remember that even though they are not in contact with people they would love to, there are still people around who would love to give them company. It is difficult but being satisfied with what you have can help.

And the biggest shock of all, Pakistan's only Nobel Laureate was banned from his own country. Abdus Salam, whose work helped in the discovery of the God Particle last week, was despised by the people of the country for being an Ahmadi and yet identifying himself as a Muslim. There are hardly any textbooks that  have his name.

Daddy...my Hero!

Yes! Yes! I knew it. I just had to speak to him. Open myself to him and I shall find my silver lining. Yes, all I can do now is work hard. Be the person I was in school and study and study and study. I remember a Hindi professor of mine telling me, "These days its not the hard work but smart work that is the key to success."

I had forgotten the former part and just remembered the latter. But truth is there is no shortcut to success. Hard work was, is and always be the key to success.

I told my Dad I am not talking to Scroogie unless I prove myself. Fair enough! Instead of condemning the gifts I have been bestowed upon, I need to utilize them to my advantage.

I just pray to God that this rekindled motivation keeps burning and keeps motivating me. Amen!

Kids today...

... are very particular.

So, I have a friend who has two boys. Mark, who is almost a year old and Dan, who is 3 years old.

Me (holding Mark in my arms), "Oh, he is such a cutie!"
Dan, "No, he is Mark."
Me, "But he is a cutie."
Dan, "No, his name is Mark."

A few minutes later,

Me to Dan, "Hey, I really like your red boots."
Dan, "These are rain boots."

Point noted Sire!

Forgiveness

I forgive you. 

Now why is it so difficult?

We have all been hurt in our lives at least once. It can be your parents who criticize your career choice, your friend who divulged your secret to your competitor or your partner who cheated on you. The hurt leaves us feeling angry and vengeful. 

Forgiveness helps us to get a grip on our life and focus on the more positive and happy aspects of it. I would not say that you should forget the wrong done to you but you need to be compassionate towards the person who has hurt you. This does not decrease or justify the wrong that was done. It just helps you to move on with your life while maintaining your peace of mind. It helps you to let go of the resentment and vengeance that leaves you feeling frustrated and miserable. A person who has hurt you is not worthy of the time you spend thinking about him. 

So how do we forgive someone?

It might take time but eventually you are able to forgive if you reflect a little bit.  I have had my share of hurts and I know I have hurt people too. I always imagine myself in their shoes when I need to forgive.  I was a victim once to somebody and by harboring resentment towards that person, I am making myself a victim again. It is better to exempt the person from offending myself any further. After reflection and developing a considerate attitude, a person can be forgiven actively and for good.